DABDA, zvikamu zvishanu zvekutarisana nekufa, zvakatanga kurondedzerwa naElizabeth Kübler-Ross mubhuku rake rekare, "On Death and Dying," muna 1969.
Zvikamu zvinomirira zvinotevera:
- Kurega
- Hasha
- Kukurukurirana
- Kuora mwoyo
- Acceptance
Nhanho shanu dzeKübler-Ross yemazamu yemuenzaniso ndiyo tsanangudzo inonyanya kuzivikanwa yemanzwiro nemagariro evanhu zvinowanikwa nevanhu vakawanda pavanotarisana nechirwere chinopisa upenyu kana mamiriro ekuchinja-hupenyu.
Iyi nhanho haisi kungoshanda kune kurasikirwa semugumisiro wekufa asi inogonawo kuitika kune mumwe munhu anowana hupenyu hwakasiyana-huchigadzirisa chiitiko, zvakadai sokurambana kana kurasikirwa nebasa.
Iyi nhanho haisati yafanirwa kuva yakakwana kana nguva. Haasi munhu wose anotarisana nehupenyu hunotyisa kana hupenyu hunoshandura huitiko hunoona mhinduro dzose dzevashanu uyewo avo vose vanozviona havazviiti nenzira yakanyorwa. Kugadziriswa kurwara, rufu, nekurasikirwa kune zvakasiyana nemunhu anovaona.
Mubhuku rake, Kübler-Ross anokurukura pfungwa iyi yekubata nenzira yakasiyana, zvinoreva kuti munhu anofamba achishandisa rimwe danho kusvika kune imwe inotevera. Akazotsanangurira kuti dzidziso iyi yakanga isina kumbofanirwa kuve yakatarisa kana kushandiswa kune vanhu vose; Nzira iyo munhu anofamba nayo kuburikidza nhanho iyi yakasiyana seyoyo.
Zvakakosha kuyeuka kuti vamwe vanhu vanozoona zvikamu zvose, vamwe mukugadzirira uye vamwe kwete, uye vamwe vanhu vanogona kungoona zvishoma zvezvikamu kana kunyange kubatana mune imwe.
Zvinonakidzawo kuziva kuti nzira iyo munhu akatarisana nayo nhamo munguva yakapfuura ichaita kuti kuongororwa kwechirwere chisingaperi kugadziriswe. Semuenzaniso, mukadzi uyo aigara achidzivisa matambudziko uye akashandura kurarama nematambudziko munguva yakapfuura angazviwana akabatanidzwa mukuramba kurongwa kwekutora kwenguva yakareba.
Saizvozvowo, murume anoshandisa kutsamwa kubata nemamiriro ezvinhu akaoma angangozviwana asingakwanisi kubva kunze kwehasha yekutsungirira.
Kurega - Chikamu 1
Isu tose tinoda kutenda kuti hapana chakaipa chingaitika kwatiri. Tisinganzwisisiki, tinogona kunyange kutenda kuti isu hatifi. Apo munhu anopiwa chirwere chechirwere chinotapukira, zvakasununguka kupinda muchikwata chekuramba uye kuzviparadzanisa. Vanogona kunge vasingatendi kuti chiremba anovaudza uye kutsvaga rwechipiri uye yechitatu pfungwa. Vanogona kuda chimiro chetsva chekuedza, vachitenda mhinduro dzekutanga kutanga dzisiri nhema. Vamwe vanhu vangatozviparadzanisa kubva kuvanachiremba vavo uye vanoramba kutongorapwa kune imwe nguva.
Munguva iyi, munhu anogonawo kuzvisiyanisa kubva kumhuri yake neshamwari kuti arege kutaura pamusoro pekurwara kwake. Vangatenda pane imwe nhanho kuti kuburikidza nekubvuma kuonekwa kwacho kuchaguma kusipo.
Iyi danho rekuramba rinowanzopfupika. Nguva pfupi mushure mekunge vapinda, vakawanda vanotanga kugamuchira kuonekwa kwavo seicho. Murwere anogona kuuya ari oga uye ozoendesa kurapwa.
Vamwe vanhu, kunyange zvakadaro, vachashandisa kuzviramba senzira yekugadzirisa kwenguva refu muurwere hwavo uye kunyange kusvika pakufa kwavo. Kuwedzerwa kuramba hakusi chinhu chakaipa nguva dzose; haisi nguva dzose kuunza kutambudzika kukuru.
Dzimwe nguva tinokanganisa tichitenda kuti vanhu vanoda kuwana nzira yekugamuchira rufu rwavo kuti vagone kufa norugare. Vaya vedu vakaona vanhu vachiramba kuramba kusvikira pakuguma vanoziva izvi hazvisi nguva dzose.
Hasha - Nhanho 2
Sezvo munhu achibvuma chokwadi chechigunwe chekugadziriswa, vanogona kutanga kubvunza, "Sei ini?" Kuziva kuti zvose zvetariro dzavo, hope, uye zvirongwa zvakarongwa zvakanaka hazvizouya pamusoro pounounza kutsamwa nekugumburwa. Zvinosuruvarisa, kutsamwa uku kunowanzoendeswa kunyika uye pasina.
Vanachiremba uye vanamukoti vanodanidzira muchipatara; Nhengo dzemhuri dzinokwaziswa nechinguva chiduku uye dzinowanzotambudzwa zvakangoerekana dzakatsamwa.
Kunyange vanhu vasingazivikanwi nezviito zvinogona kutsamwa.
Zvakakosha kunzwisisa uko kutsamwa uku kuchibva. Munhu anofa angatarisa TV ndokuona vanhu vachiseka uye vachitamba-chiyeuchidzo chinokuvadza chokuti haagoni kufamba zvakare, regai kutamba kutamba.
Mune bhuku rinonzi On Death and Dying , Kübler-Ross anorondedzera zvakajeka kutsamwa uku: "Achasimudza inzwi rake, achaita zvaanoda, acharamba achinyunyuta ndokukumbira kuti aonekwe, zvichida sekuchema kukuru kwokupedzisira, 'Ndiri mupenyu, usakanganwa izvozvo iwe unogona kunzwa inzwi rangu, ini handina kufa!
Kune vanhu vazhinji, danho iri rekugadzirisa rinogarawo kwenguva pfupi. Zvakare, zvisinei, vamwe vanhu vacharamba vachitsamwa nokuda kwechirwere chikuru. Vamwe vangatofa vakatsamwa.
Kutaurirana - Nhanho 3
Kana kuramba uye kutsamwa kusina chinangwa chakatarisirwa, munyaya iyi kukanganiswa kusina kururama kana kurapa kwezvishamiso, vanhu vakawanda vacharamba vachiita zvekutaurirana. Vazhinji vedu takatoedza kugoverana pane imwe nguva muupenyu hwedu. Vana vanodzidza kubva pazera remakore kuti kutsamwira Amai paanoti "kwete" hazvibatsire, asi kuedza nzira yakasiyana kunogona. Kungofanana nemwana ane nguva yokufungisisa kutsamwa kwake uye anotanga nzira yekukurukura nemubereki, saka vanhu vazhinji vane chirwere chisingaperi.
Vanhu vazhinji vanopinda mudanho rekutaurirana vanoita saizvozvo kuna Mwari wavo. Vanogona kubvumirana kuti vararame hupenyu hwakanaka, vabatsire avo vanoshayiwa, vasamboreva zvakare, kana kuti nhamba ipi ye "zvakanaka" zvinhu kana simba ravo rakapfuura rinongoporesa zvirwere zvavo.
Vamwe vanhu vanogona kutaurirana navanachiremba kana nehutano pachahwo. Vanogona kuedza kutaurirana kwenguva yakawanda vachitaura zvinhu zvakadai, "Kana ndikwanisa kurarama kwenguva yakareba zvakakwana kuti ndione mwanasikana wangu aroora ..." kana kuti "Dai chete ndaigona kukwira motokari yangu imwe nguva ..." kuti havazobvunzizve chimwe chinhu kana kuda kwavo kuchipiwa. Vanhu vanopinda muchigamba ichi vanokurumidza kudzidza kuti kutaurirana hakubatsiri uye zvinongoramba zvichienderera mberi, kazhinji kunzvimbo yekuora mwoyo.
Kuora mwoyo - Chikamu 4
Kana zvikava pachena kuti chirwere chisingaperi chinogara kuti chigare, vanhu vazhinji vanonzwa kuora mwoyo. Iko kuwedzerwa mutoro wekuvhiya, kurapa, uye zviratidzo zvemuviri zvekurwara, somuenzaniso, kuita kuti zvive nyore kune vamwe vanhu kuramba vakatsamwa kana kumanikidzira smile smile. Kushungurudzika, zvakare, kunogona kupinda mukati.
Kübler-Ross anotsanangura kuti kune mhando mbiri dzekuora mwoyo mune ino danga. Kutambudzika kwekutanga, iyo yaakadana kuti "kuora mwoyo," kunoitika sekutarisana nekurasikirwa kwezvino uye kwekare. Semuenzaniso, mukadzi uyo anonzi ane chirwere chekenza chibereko angatanga kurasikirwa nechibereko chake nekuvhiyiwa uye vhudzi rake kune chemotherapy. Murume wake akasara asina rubatsiro kutarisira vana vavo vatatu, paanenge achirwara uye anofanira kutumira vana kumunhu wemhuri kunze kweguta. Nemhaka yokuti kurapwa kwekenza kwaidhura, mukadzi uyu nemudzimai wake havagone kutenga mari yavo uye vanoda kutengesa imba yavo. Mukadzi wacho anonzwa pfungwa yakadzama yekurasikirwa nemumwe wezviitiko izvi uye anopindira mukuderera.
Rudzi rwechipiri rwekuora mwoyo kunonzi "kugadzirisa kuora mwoyo." Iyi ndiyo danho apo munhu anofanira kutarisana nekusara kwekusangana kwezvinhu zvose nevose vavanoda. Vanhu vazhinji vachapedza nguva ino yekuchema mukutaura kwakanyarara sezvo vachizvigadzirira ivo kurasikirwa kwakakwana.
Iyi danho rekuora mwoyo chinhu chinokosha kupfuura. Inguva yekuchema iyo inokosha kune munhu anofa kurarama nerufu rwavo. Kana vakakwanisa kushungurudzika zvizere nekufamba kuburikidza nekuora mwoyo, danho rekubvuma richazotevera.
Kubvuma - Chikamu 5
Nzvimbo yekugamuchirwa ndeyokuti vanhu vazhinji vangada kuvapo kana vafa. Icho chikwata chekugadzirisa murugare kuti rufu ruchaitika uye tarisiro yakanyarara yekuuya kwayo. Kana munhu ane ruzivo rwakakwana kuti asvike padanho rino, rufu runowanzova nerunyararo. Vane mvumo yekuratidza kutya, kutsamwa, uye kusuruvara. Vane nguva yekugadzirisa uye kutaura zvakanaka kune vanodiwa. Munhu wacho anewo nguva yekuchema kusuwa kwevanhu vazhinji vanokosha uye zvinhu zvinoreva zvakawanda kwavari.
Vamwe vanhu vanoonekwa kuti vanonoka mukurwara kwavo uye havana nguva yokushanda kuburikidza nematanho anokosha vangave vasina kumbobvuma kugamuchira kwechokwadi. Vamwe vasingagoni kufamba kubva kune imwe nzvimbo-murume uyo anoramba akatsamwa pasi kusvikira afa, somuenzaniso-angasambotarisana nerunyararo rwekugamuchirwa . Kune munhu ane nhanho uyo anouya pakugamuchirwa, danho rekupedzisira rufu risati ramboshandiswa mukufungisisa runyararo sezvavanopinda mukati kuti vagadzirire kuenda kwavo kwokupedzisira.
> Sources:
> Kübler-Ross, E. Pakufa uye Kufa. 1969. New York, NY: Scribner Vaparidzi.
> Nhanho 5 dzekutambudzika. Psycom. 2017.